06-20-2009, 01:01 PM
06-20-2009, 01:33 PM
I am not surprised he has not come out and apologized for that too.
I am not impressed by his so called skills, my dog can catch em flying.
06-20-2009, 05:41 PM
Did anyone see PETA's response:
But now People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, calling it an "execution," wants the commander-in-chief to show a little more compassion to even "the least sympathetic animals."
It just further proves what nuts they are.
Lisa Van Loo
06-23-2009, 04:22 PM
I don't know who wrote this, but it's a classic!
Grieving widow faces uphill legal Battle against President
WASHINGTON -- The widow of the housefly murdered by Barack Obama
During a recent CNBC television interview announced this morning
That she would be filing a wrongful death suit against the
President in federal district court. The plaintiff brief -- citing
Pain, suffering and loss of income -- seeks a formal apology and
Compensatory damages, including an unspecified quantity of shit.
"Bob was a wonderful husband and provider," said the widow, Mrs.
Vivian Vvzzvzwwzzz, wiping tears from her compound eyes. "Even
Though he was always busy at the Rose Garden turd pile, he always
Flew home in time to tuck in our maggots."
The 17-day old widow said the grieving process since the murder has
Taken its toll.
"Although it's been nearly 48 hours, I still get an empty feeling
In my thorax everytime I think about it," she said. "I feel like
I've aged an entire week. Mating season is over, and here I am,
Stuck trying to raise 532 larvae on my own."
Vvzzvzwwzzz described the "abdomen-wrenching horror" she
Experienced while watching the President casually assassinate her
Husband during the live broadcast.
"It was just before supper time and I was predigesting the evening
Shit for the kids," she recalled. "When I looked up at the TV I saw Bob
there, and of course I was pretty excited. He started waving at
Me, and then, all of a sudden, SLAP! My whole world, my life, layed
Smashed across the back of Obama's left hand. And with 360 degree
Peripheral vision and hundreds of eye facets, it was impossible to
Ever since the incident, Mrs. Vvzzvzwwzzz said she had been trying
To piece her life back together.
"I just get paralyzed wondering how I'm going to raise my larvae
For the next six days, alone, without any kind of support," she
Said. "Most days I just end up on the clung to the ceiling, numb
And crying, eating a rancid bowl of Ben & Jerry's."
Breaking down, an emotionally distraught Vvzzvzwwzzz was comforted
By PETA President Ingrid Newkirk and ACLU President Nadine
Strossen. The two groups announced they will file an amicus brief
In the case and file a separate class action suit against the
Insecticide, flyswatter and pest strip industries, seeking over 1
Million metric tons of compensatory shit on behalf of 200 billion
"The President's treatment of the Fly community has been extremely
Disappointing, " said Newkirk. "He almost seemed to relish his
Bloodthirsty attack on Mr. Vvzzvzwwzzz. It's obvious he's in the
Pocket of Big Manure."
University of Tennessee law professor Glenn Reynolds said
Vvzzvzwwzzz v. Obama is likely to raise several thorny
"The courts have a lot of questions to sort out here," he said.
"For example, can a sitting president be forced to testify in a
Civil suit? Can he give himself immunity? How does this effect the
Rights of cooties and crab lice? Also, just how completely batshit
Insane is PETA?"
Despite the prospect of facing a challenge from the President's
Formidable legal team, Vvzzvzwwzzz said she was prepared to pursuit
It all the way to the Supreme Court.
"If Mr. Obama thinks he can shoo me away with his legal briefs and
His rolled-up New York Times, then he is sadly mistaken," said an
Angry Vvzzvzwwzzz. "He has no idea how persistent and annoying I
Can be. I'm in this for the long haul. All the way till July, if
I'm still alive."
Reynolds cautioned that no matter how determined the plaintiff,
Such a prolonged legal battle against the President could prove
"Mrs. Vvzzvzwwzzz is likely to end up spending millions in legal
Fees, with an unknown probability of success. Even if she prevails,
The ACLU and PETA lawyers will eat 40% of her shit settlement in
Contingency fees," he said.
Vvzzvzwwzz said she would be establishing a legal fund to help
Defray the cost of the suit, and appealed to the public for
"PETA has been very generous in relocating my family to a welcoming
New neighborhood filled with filthy, stoned, slow-reflexed vegans,
But we still need money for court costs," she said. "Help meee-eee!
Help meee-ee-eee- eee!"
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