PDA

View Full Version : Just for laughs GDG



Gerry Clinchy
10-05-2011, 11:11 AM
No offense intended to any "southern boys" on the forum.

THE TOP 31 THINGS THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR SOUTHERN BOYS SAY:

31. When I retire, I'm movin' north.

30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.

29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

28. Duct tape won't fix that.

27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken

26. We don't keep firearms in this house.

25. You can't feed that to the dog.

24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.

23. Wrestling is fake.

22. We're vegetarians.

21. Do you think my gut is too big?

20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.

19. Honey, we don't need another dog.

18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?

17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.

15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

14. Trim the fat off that steak.

13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

12. The tires on that truck are too big.

11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.

10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.

9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

7. Checkmate

6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.

4. I don't have a favorite college team.

3. You Guys.

2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:
1. Nope, no more beer for me. I'm driving a whole bus load of us down to re-elect OBAMA!

Jacob Hawkes
10-05-2011, 01:30 PM
No offense intended to any "southern boys" on the forum.

THE TOP 31 THINGS THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR SOUTHERN BOYS SAY:

31. When I retire, I'm movin' north.
Nope. Sure won't.
30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.
Blank Stare. Blank Stare.
29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
Nah.
28. Duct tape won't fix that.
I'm not a redneck.
27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken
Been there. Said that.
26. We don't keep firearms in this house.
Is that possible?
25. You can't feed that to the dog.
All the time.
24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.
Depends.
23. Wrestling is fake.
All the time.
22. We're vegetarians.
That's just gayyyy.
21. Do you think my gut is too big?
Depending on how bloated I feel.
20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
Gayyyy.
19. Honey, we don't need another dog.
Nah.
18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?
Taught The Civil War in HS. What do you think?
17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
If I decide to have them @ all.
16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
Not a redneck.
15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
Sometimes I wish that was true.
14. Trim the fat off that steak.
Absolutely.
13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
Eh, it depends.
12. The tires on that truck are too big.
It could.
11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.
Nah.
10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.
Blank Stare. Blank Stare.
9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
Yeah, the lucky woman won't have a name like that.
8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
Do they still sale that?
7. Checkmate
All the time
6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
Seriously?
5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
Still not a redneck.
4. I don't have a favorite college team.
Again, gayyyy.
3. You Guys.
To say, "Heyyyy you guyyyyssss."
2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.
Uh, where to start?
AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:
1. Nope, no more beer for me. I'm driving a whole bus load of us down to re-elect OBAMA!
Any self respecting American will not vote for him.

Well I think that is that.