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View Full Version : How to ask, what can you Do about limited mental ability



luvmylabs23139
02-16-2013, 09:58 AM
Here are the facts. If my timing is wrong I can get stuck if not paying attention with the not all there bagger of my groceries. I tried to avoid any line he is bagging groceries on for no other reason that he screws up and takes forever. If I somehow end up in the line (he moves) I try to bag as much of my stuff as I can (eggs do not go on the bottom!!!!)
OK guys fast forward to yesterday. He was following me around the store. Kind of creepy. Then he shows up and kinda bags my groceries ( I did as much as I could). then he shows up in the parking lot in the rain.

charly_t
02-16-2013, 10:17 AM
It is not easy to get someone into a mental hospital anymore. I speak from a little experience. I won't go into all the details but having a family member who is retarded and her having married a man with "problems" that his family won't admit that he has, plus laws passed to protect those with disabilities you have a maze of problems. I was told by the powers that be that at 18 my grandaughter was no longer my concern and to quit trying to control her life. That I had no legal right to do anything. Someone hired an advocate for her. The advocate must have explained all her "rights" to our grandaughter because the advocate and she went to the agency who looked after her and "fired" the agency. Government again.

sick lids
02-16-2013, 03:15 PM
Sadly nothing you can do until a crime has been committed. Many families struggle with this, prison is often the only treatment centers available after they turn 18. Protect your self if it gets to creepy feeling. Maybe discreetly call store manager, this is probably not just happening to you. Could be a psycho waiting to blow or could be the nicest person you could ever meet. There was once a girl that would follow me around like that, she had the mental compacity of a five year old. When she turned 18 she married a drunk with a penchant for violence. Her mother wished she could have married me like she always said she was. She isn't so happy any more last I heard. Very sad.

dback
02-16-2013, 04:02 PM
Speak with the manager......or not........try another store.......heck, maybe you're just too "hot" to resist Luv! ;-)

Dan Storts
02-16-2013, 06:21 PM
If someone with a issue, per my officer friend, there are 2 results. 18 years old, 36 hours and bye bye with a signature. Unless they have committed harm to themselves or someone else. It is our PC society but someone has the ethic to work at the grocery store while someone else is laying on their back, collecting a government check. :(

luvalab
02-16-2013, 07:47 PM
Speak to the manager--just like you would with any employee. Simply describe your experience, as objectively as possible. If this person is able to grow from the feedback, then he deserves the feedback and the opportunity to grow from it; if he can't, then the manager needs to know so that it can be managed.

When you are a retail manager, you deal with The Special (usually undiagnosed and not obvious!) all day long every day--he or she should appreciate the info and will figure out what to do with it.

I don't know about elsewhere, but in Ohio Kroger seems to hire a lot of people with special needs, bothe physical and mental, and they seem to do a good job with it--I think it's a good thing and try to appreciate it... Or if I'm having a long day already, at least not mind it.

Ken Bora
02-18-2013, 08:52 AM
OK guys fast forward to yesterday. He was following me around the store. Kind of creepy.

you sure? baggers go on price checks. "Billy, get the price on chopped nuts"


Then he shows up and kinda bags my groceries ( I did as much as I could).

back at his post, sounds like a good worker


then he shows up in the parking lot in the rain.

funny how the shopping carts do not bring themself inside, "they" get scent out in the crap more often than Molly the Mall Goddess working the expres check out.

so often you gripe about those lazy slobs livin' on the dole and squeezin' out kids to stay in the country. and here this kid is WORKING! Doing his best to pull his weight and not live off of society. Even though, from no fault of his own, he is a bit behind the rest of the pack. and you gripe about him as well? Learn his name, shake his hand, say hello, engage in conversation. Fear not, you can not "Catch" what ails him.
Gosh girl you are a puzzle to me at times! ;-)

charly_t
02-18-2013, 11:48 AM
If someone with a issue, per my officer friend, there are 2 results. 18 years old, 36 hours and bye bye with a signature. Unless they have committed harm to themselves or someone else. It is our PC society but someone has the ethic to work at the grocery store while someone else is laying on their back, collecting a government check. :(

Some retarded people are earning a paycheck ( maybe ) and drawing a check ( SSI ) also. They may also have a "job coach" with them to help them learn the job. From what I have seen that job coach is often a waste of money. They hired my family member to help on a playground with small children ( heaven help us all ). The family member also has no ability to count etc. They put her in a job once where she was required to keep track of how many samples she handed out.....Hello ! This is a government run fiasco !!!! Inmates running the mental hospital.

P.S. So I can't spell ........again.

duk4me
02-18-2013, 01:50 PM
you sure? baggers go on price checks. "Billy, get the price on chopped nuts"



back at his post, sounds like a good worker



funny how the shopping carts do not bring themself inside, "they" get scent out in the crap more often than Molly the Mall Goddess working the expres check out.

so often you gripe about those lazy slobs livin' on the dole and squeezin' out kids to stay in the country. and here this kid is WORKING! Doing his best to pull his weight and not live off of society. Even though, from no fault of his own, he is a bit behind the rest of the pack. and you gripe about him as well? Learn his name, shake his hand, say hello, engage in conversation. Fear not, you can not "Catch" what ails him.
Gosh girl you are a puzzle to me at times! ;-)

Ken,

Thank you for your post. I have avoided this thread because it made me so angry that I was afraid of what I would post. I have decided to post my personal experience.

Several years ago before I moved back to my hometown I shopped at a local grocery store that employed a challenged employee. He always made me a little uneasy but mainly it was my fault because he wasn't like me. The first time he carried my groceries out I gave him a small tip. He was in disbelief that someone would do that for him. It made me feel bad that I felt uneasy in the first place for such a kind and genuine human being.

The next time I went to the store he switched with the high school bagger to bag my groceries. I thought well I guess he wants the tip. We got out to my truck and I pulled out my money and he refused to take it and gave me a hug. I cried on the way home for being such a sad cynical person to doubt his intentions.

I miss the hug I used to get when I shopped there........he had the milk of human kindness in his soul.

Tim Carrion
02-18-2013, 02:48 PM
Talk to him. If he is following you in the store give him a job ie can you go get X for me? Ask him to but the eggs in a certain or separate bag.

Personally I'm much prefer someone of limited capabilities giving their 100% than the fully capable disinterested person doing a 1/2 *ss job and acting like they are doing me a favor.


Tim

Tim

mjh345
02-18-2013, 02:52 PM
he had the milk of human kindness in his soul.

Surely you aren't implying that our own dear sweet Luvvy might not have that same quality??:)

duk4me
02-18-2013, 03:11 PM
Surely you aren't implying that our own dear sweet Luvvy might not have that same quality??:)

I hope she has the mental acuity to consider it......

sick lids
02-18-2013, 03:20 PM
Hopefully we can have some more warm fuzzys on potus.

Ken Bora
02-18-2013, 04:32 PM
Ken,

Thank you for your post. .

Your Welcome Tim,
Luv, I just voted on this thread and I chose 1 star.
'cause that is a low as I am able to vote with the rtf thread rate tool.

charly_t
02-18-2013, 06:02 PM
Well this thread has went a different direction than I would have thought it would. I guess we should have made it plain who we were talking about...........those who are not dangerous and those who are. And where each one could fit in.

duk4me
02-18-2013, 06:02 PM
Hopefully we can have some more warm fuzzys on potus.

Sometimes as we get older we realize the warm and fuzzys are something to be cherished, they are real. I have no problem calling BS on here nor being called BS.

I feel for the person trying to make it sacking groceries when he is at such a mental disadvantage. Not all of us are blessed with above average intelligence. As a matter of fact I heard somewhere that half of us were born with below average intelligence. Of course its math and I'm not very good at math.

I hope that you and your family are blessed on the top half and never get to experience the other half.

HPL
02-18-2013, 08:54 PM
Sometimes as we get older we realize the warm and fuzzys are something to be cherished, they are real. I have no problem calling BS on here nor being called BS.

I feel for the person trying to make it sacking groceries when he is at such a mental disadvantage. Not all of us are blessed with above average intelligence. As a matter of fact I heard somewhere that half of us were born with below average intelligence. Of course its math and I'm not very good at math.

I hope that you and your family are blessed on the top half and never get to experience the other half.

I'll tell you right now that for those of us in the top 5% dealing with those (not calling any names here) in the other 95% can really be a daily trial!! ;-) (took me into my 40's to realize that frequently, stupid just can't help it).

Marvin S
02-18-2013, 09:16 PM
I hope that you and your family are blessed on the top half and never get to experience the other half.

On the Bell Curve by profession - Scientists, Doctors, Engineers & Lawyers come from the top 15% of the IQ world - Teachers (K-12) in general come from the lower 25% - Businessmen are in the middle of those two ;-).

HPL
02-18-2013, 09:22 PM
On the Bell Curve by profession - Scientists, Doctors, Engineers & Lawyers come from the top 15% of the IQ world - Teachers (K-12) in general come from the lower 25% - Businessmen are in the middle of those two ;-).

I can't believe that teachers are in the lower 25%. I had quite a few good teachers, my mom was a teacher and had a MENSA qualifying GRE score (putting her in the top 2%) and let's face it, anyone below the mid point is pretty much dumb as a stick.;-)

Marvin S
02-19-2013, 08:01 AM
I can't believe that teachers are in the lower 25%. I had quite a few good teachers, my mom was a teacher and had a MENSA qualifying GRE score (putting her in the top 2%) and let's face it, anyone below the mid point is pretty much dumb as a stick.;-)

The source of the numbers, Thomas Sowell & George Will, both of whom quoted a source for those findings. Regardless of individuals it is a group thingy. Sort of like, my congressman is OK but you need to vote yours out of office :).

gdgnyc
02-19-2013, 08:15 AM
Ken,

Thank you for your post. I have avoided this thread because it made me so angry that I was afraid of what I would post. I have decided to post my personal experience.

Several years ago before I moved back to my hometown I shopped at a local grocery store that employed a challenged employee. He always made me a little uneasy but mainly it was my fault because he wasn't like me. The first time he carried my groceries out I gave him a small tip. He was in disbelief that someone would do that for him. It made me feel bad that I felt uneasy in the first place for such a kind and genuine human being.

The next time I went to the store he switched with the high school bagger to bag my groceries. I thought well I guess he wants the tip. We got out to my truck and I pulled out my money and he refused to take it and gave me a hug. I cried on the way home for being such a sad cynical person to doubt his intentions.

I miss the hug I used to get when I shopped there........he had the milk of human kindness in his soul.

Tim, I was touched by your story. Where I shop, they give the mentally disabled jobs bagging groceries. I will give them conversation, thank them, wish them a nice day. And I would never complain about their mistakes. If I would do anything, I would tell them personally what I thought. And I agree with Tim Carrion 100%.

Ken Bora
02-19-2013, 08:22 AM
Well this thread has went a different direction than I would have thought it would. I guess we should have made it plain who we were talking about...........those who are not dangerous and those who are. And where each one could fit in.

when you see this feller baggin' eggs at the stop&shop,
we can come back to this and make it plain. Until then,
what in Luvies OP could make anyone think danger?
http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQtxSN1fJsa49rqmmDDydqtmRAODb56Y 1isBkw-zhrUkdkmpYd_ts2LwTUd
.

luvalab
02-19-2013, 09:38 AM
when you see this feller baggin' eggs at the stop&shop,
we can come back to this and make it plain. Until then,
what in Luvies OP could make anyone think danger?
http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQtxSN1fJsa49rqmmDDydqtmRAODb56Y 1isBkw-zhrUkdkmpYd_ts2LwTUd
.

I guess I wasn't thinking "danger" so much as "discomfort."

I was in retail for a long enough time--as a manager, I would rather have a customer complain and then I could choose to ignore the complaint or work on it my own way rather than not have the customer complain and just leave, or maybe worse, complain at the wrong level and take it out of my hands.

But your answer is still better, I do believe. :)

mjh345
02-19-2013, 10:08 AM
If shunning those with limited mental ability were my goal, then I wouldn't respond to this thread:)

Golddogs
02-19-2013, 11:49 AM
I hope she has the mental acuity to consider it......

One can always hope...........


Carl was a kid that lived behind and up the street from us. Carl was different. Not sure if it was Downs or just mentally challanged. As a kid, I would see him playing in his yard, he lived next to a friend of mine, and would always wave. We waved back. Carl lived with his mom. As he got older, Carl would ride his bike, a 3 wheeler, around the neighborhood picking up trash ( he had a big basket behind his seat). As he got even older. Carl tricked out his bike with slow vehicle signs, streamers, stickers and expanded his world. It was not uncommon to see him miles from home, riding his bike, picking up others trash and cans. Years after I left, when I came over to see my Mom, I would see Carl and say hello and he would wave. I would see him all over, on his bike, being Carl.
A couple of years ago, there was an article in the St.Paul paper about Carl. He still rode his bike, but now, he had good job and had saved enough to buy a house. He was soo proud.
I am proud and humbled to to know Carl and hope others meet a special person like him to be kind to and watch grow. I am glad I was raised to be kind to others and thus got to experience Carl.

BonMallari
02-19-2013, 12:24 PM
I wish I could post a warm fuzzy story but I cant, because I had an incident with a mentally challenged person that could have ended in a not so good way.

I was working at a golf driving range in SoCal in the shop selling golf clubs and doing some simple golf club repair in exchange for unlimited golf range time. Well along comes this rather large man who asks me where his golf club is, I had no idea what he was talking about since I had no previous dealings with him. When I turned to walk away from him the guy put me in a headlock from behind. He outweighed me by a good fifty lbs and then some. The guy could have snapped my neck like a twig but I was able to grab a nearby golf club and whack his shin which caused him to let go..by then help had arrived in the form of one of the golf pros

The range was owned by a former police officer and I was adamant about pressing assault charges, but it was apparent that I was not going to get the backing from the owners since this man was the "local town Lenny" (of Mice and Men by Steinbeck). I was fuming and quit on the spot, the event shook me up for a couple of weeks, but it also shows that there are people out there that can be dangerous even though you think they wouldn't hurt a flea..

In today's world had the same type of event happened and had I been armed..well you draw your own conclusion

charly_t
02-19-2013, 12:57 PM
Bon, I'm with you. We have had a lot of contact with retarded etc. people. We know one man whoes "people" ( including the experts ) say he is not dangerous. He loves attention and will do anything to get it. It is my belief that someday he will hurt someone badly with one of his attention getting escapades. His family has money and have constantly rescued him in the past. Then there is the retarded guy who works at the video rental place who tried very hard to run over an older friend of mine. She has since died but at that time she was very unsteady on her feet but doing her own errands etc. I'm sure she was correct and he thought it would be fun to "bump" into her. It's the judgement that many of these people are lacking. Luvy felt threatened I'm sure. Most people should pay attention to these feelings. My grandaughter has had many retarded friends over the years and some of them are a hair away from doing something dangerous. People who only saw her for a short space of time never knew her. They just thought that they knew her ( including the "experts" ). She finally spent time with people who found out she could get mad. The thing that bothers me is that many people are unkind to those with retardation and cause more problems for them. If the retarded are required to work with or around unkind people it just makes then act that way also. They may see it as acceptable behavior. They need to be protected as much as we do of course.

duk4me
02-19-2013, 01:17 PM
I wish I could post a warm fuzzy story but I cant, because I had an incident with a mentally challenged person that could have ended in a not so good way.

I was working at a golf driving range in SoCal in the shop selling golf clubs and doing some simple golf club repair in exchange for unlimited golf range time. Well along comes this rather large man who asks me where his golf club is, I had no idea what he was talking about since I had no previous dealings with him. When I turned to walk away from him the guy put me in a headlock from behind. He outweighed me by a good fifty lbs and then some. The guy could have snapped my neck like a twig but I was able to grab a nearby golf club and whack his shin which caused him to let go..by then help had arrived in the form of one of the golf pros

The range was owned by a former police officer and I was adamant about pressing assault charges, but it was apparent that I was not going to get the backing from the owners since this man was the "local town Lenny" (of Mice and Men by Steinbeck). I was fuming and quit on the spot, the event shook me up for a couple of weeks, but it also shows that there are people out there that can be dangerous even though you think they wouldn't hurt a flea..

In today's world had the same type of event happened and had I been armed..well you draw your own conclusion

Heck Bon he was just giving you a hug.:p

Two things, First I would have pressed charges anyway he needed to be exposed and secondly did he ever get charges filed on him by someone later.

All our experiences are different I guess and I'm sorry that yours was so negative. Steinbeck, my favorite author btw.

BonMallari
02-19-2013, 01:23 PM
Bon, I'm with you. We have had a lot of contact with retarded etc. people. We know one man whoes "people" ( including the experts ) say he is not dangerous. He loves attention and will do anything to get it. It is my belief that someday he will hurt someone badly with one of his attention getting escapades. His family has money and have constantly rescued him in the past. Then there is the retarded guy who works at the video rental place who tried very hard to run over an older friend of mine. She has since died but at that time she was very unsteady on her feet but doing her own errands etc. I'm sure she was correct and he thought it would be fun to "bump" into her. It's the judgement that many of these people are lacking. Luvy felt threatened I'm sure. Most people should pay attention to these feelings. My grandaughter has had many retarded friends over the years and some of them are a hair away from doing something dangerous. People who only saw her for a short space of time never knew her. They just thought that they knew her ( including the "experts" ). She finally spent time with people who found out she could get mad. The thing that bothers me is that many people are unkind to those with retardation and cause more problems for them. If the retarded are required to work with or around unkind people it just makes then act that way also. They may see it as acceptable behavior. They need to be protected as much as we do of course.


Exactly and therein lies the Catch 22....they are just as much a danger to themselves as they are to others, because they may not realize that fire is hot,or that strange dogs do bite,or that there are some sick demented people out there that will do hideous and vulgar things to them, such as video tape them fighting or other despicable acts....

the mentally handicapped are defenseless in may ways, they don't realize how much harm they can do if left unsupervised...But we as a society turn a blind eye...

My SIL' older brother has been institutionalized since he was in grade school and now he is in his sixties, we worry that he may outlive his entire family and have no one to oversee his welfare...
He is one of those gentle souls who has NEVER hurt anyone, was always great with his nephews/nieces but could never fully take care of himself...

Unfortunately not quite sure what the solution is to solving the nation's problem with the mentally ill is. We cant lock them all up, cant turn them all loose, cant keep throwing money at the problem...and unfortunately it seems that all we do as a society is turn our heads and look the other way

charly_t
02-19-2013, 01:58 PM
I don't see any good answers so far. The "sheltered" work shops and the group homes have advantages. I don't know about the costs to run ( etc. ) these places. When we visited the group homes and looked into that cost it was reasonable but that was about 16 years back. We visited one of the Dale Evans group homes for females and it looked good at that time. I do not like what I hear about the co-ed group homes.
Both sexes have been abused by other residents ( and staff ). Whistle blowers often lose their jobs in these places and things don't get taken care of. We as tax payers pay for round the clock care in single apartments for some people and they get abused at times. In our state some foster homes get about $1000. per person ( per month ) for looking after the people who are retarded. One lady has 4 or 5 men in her care. One family that I heard about ( husband and wife ) earn a sum of about $8000. per month. I have no idea about the number of children that they have. I do see an ad for foster parents for an independant agency and the pay was at least $1000. per month. Personally I don't see how a person could care for a retared person for that amount. I have no idea how much we spent on the grandaughter each year that we kept her ( family members did not get any money back then when caring for a child ).

duk4me
02-19-2013, 05:19 PM
I think we are talkin about apples and oranges.

huntinman
02-19-2013, 05:54 PM
Yeah, but one never know when an apple might become an orange... Personal experience regards...

duk4me
02-19-2013, 06:07 PM
Yeah, but one never know when an apple might become an orange... Personal experience regards...

Please share it Bill the rest of us have shared our personal experiences.

huntinman
02-19-2013, 06:17 PM
Please share it Bill the rest of us have shared our personal experiences.

Some things are better left unsaid, especially on a public forum. Lets just say that the situation I am referring to was within my own family and did not have a pretty outcome. Also resulted in jail time for the apple/orange.

duk4me
02-19-2013, 06:41 PM
Some things are better left unsaid, especially on a public forum. Lets just say that the situation I am referring to was within my own family and did not have a pretty outcome. Also resulted in jail time for the apple/orange.

Well we had a teacher that bordered on genius bust into our church and kill five, I guess that is grapefruit/plum. Didn't ask for individuals or family history just the situation.

By apples and oranges the people I am referring to and though I can't speak for Ken I feel he is speaking of also are wonderful human beings. Not retarded as some have mentioned but not Rhodes Scholars that are busting their ass happily to pay their way. They don't have the ability to be CEO's and I'm sure some would just call them DA's and laugh at them. Me I choose to celebrate their accomplishments as meager as they seem to some.

I feel bad for you and your families experience. Perhaps family members should be proactive and perhaps we wouldn't have these Sandy Hooks. Was that guy retarded or did he have mental illness? There is a difference.

BonMallari
02-19-2013, 06:50 PM
Well we had a teacher that bordered on genius bust into our church and kill five, I guess that is grapefruit/plum. Didn't ask for individuals or family history just the situation.

By apples and oranges the people I am referring to and though I can't speak for Ken I feel he is speaking of also are wonderful human beings. Not retarded as some have mentioned but not Rhodes Scholars that are busting their ass happily to pay their way. They don't have the ability to be CEO's and I'm sure some would just call them DA's and laugh at them. Me I choose to celebrate their accomplishments as meager as they seem to some.

I feel bad for you and your families experience. Perhaps family members should be proactive and perhaps we wouldn't have these Sandy Hooks. Was that guy retarded or did he have mental illness? There is a difference.

sometime's that "difference" is a very fine line, often associated with a numerical score on an abitrary test...lust because I scored 140 on a MENSA test doesnt make me a genius, nor does Vince Young scoring 9 on the Wonderlich test make him a moron/idiot (well maybe that's debateable)

duk4me
02-19-2013, 07:02 PM
sometime's that "difference" is a very fine line, often associated with a numerical score on an abitrary test...lust because I scored 140 on a MENSA test doesnt make me a genius, nor does Vince Young scoring 9 on the Wonderlich test make him a moron/idiot (well maybe that's debateable)

I respectfully disagree Bon. Mental illness has nothing to do with IQ, believe me I know. A person with an 80 IQ and a person with 140 IQ has no bearing on mental illness. Mental Illness can be brought on by several different factors including abuse or chemical imbalances in the brain. Mental Illness can come and go low IQ or high IQ cannot.

I am not a psychologist but if we have one on RTF I would love for them to weigh in on this. Hard to believe whats her name has actually created a useful thread.

BonMallari
02-19-2013, 07:14 PM
I respectfully disagree Bon. Mental illness has nothing to do with IQ, believe me I know. A person with an 80 IQ and a person with 140 IQ has no bearing on mental illness. Mental Illness can be brought on by several different factors including abuse or chemical imbalances in the brain. Mental Illness can come and go low IQ or high IQ cannot.

I am not a psychologist but if we have one on RTF I would love for them to weigh in on this. Hard to believe whats her name has actually created a useful thread.

Ok I can agree with your point....its just that mental illness can be anything from being manic-depressant like one of my exes, who shall remain nameless, to being certifiable bat scat looney tunes...and dont even get me started on those that have multiple personality disorders ala Sybil

duk4me
02-19-2013, 07:21 PM
Ok I can agree with your point....its just that mental illness can be anything from being manic-depressant like one of my exes, who shall remain nameless, to being certifiable bat scat looney tunes...and dont even get me started on those that have multiple personality disorders ala Sybil

OK there you go Bon talking about my sister Sybil, thought we were leaving family out of this.:)

charly_t
02-19-2013, 07:52 PM
The apple/orange is a good example. Some retarded or otherwise handicapped people can also be mentally ill. And each of them are very different from each other ( maybe more so than the general population ). Just like we do they have bad days sometimes. My old vet had a retarded brother who seemed to live an evenly regulated life without a lot of problems. He was a dish washer in a good place. So my vet had a soft spot for retarded people and he hired them. There came a time when he told me that he no longer bothered to hire them. Most if not all of them just decided they did not want to work some days and therefore just skipped work that day. They are often like small children and do not understand that other people are counting on them. My grandaughter may seem to understand something one day and the next day she does not. Time means nothing to her. People have thought that they had managed to teach her something but they find out that she does not retain it. She couldn't or wouldn't call the doctor's office when her daughter was sick ( bad ear infection ). She was told to do so and completely ignored that or forgot. She and her husband are both retarded and mentally ill. Both had mothers who abused sustances. They have now started to get in trouble with LE. Both have been in jail lately. You bet I am biased.

luvmylabs23139
02-21-2013, 10:35 PM
you sure? baggers go on price checks. "Billy, get the price on chopped nuts"

Yeah, no price check, I worked that gig years ago.

back at his post, sounds like a good worker eggs in the bottom???



funny how the shopping carts do not bring themself inside, "they" get scent out in the crap more often than Molly the Mall Goddess working the expres check out. shagging strays was fun, you get the darn carts not hang out waiting for a cart when there are a ton you can take inside.

so often you gripe about those lazy slobs livin' on the dole and squeezin' out kids to stay in the country. and here this kid is WORKING! Doing his best to pull his weight and not live off of society. Even though, from no fault of his own, he is a bit behind the rest of the pack. and you gripe about him as well? Learn his name, shake his hand, say hello, engage in conversation. Fear not, you can not "Catch" what ails him.
Gosh girl you are a puzzle to me at times! ;-)
I worked grocery retail and this guy is not helping anything. If you get stuck and he is suddenly bagging your groceries add on time. I am despite my postings generally very tolerant. I just try to avoid him and until the other day it was nothing more than no eggs on the bottom and let me do it so I can get out of here. Always been that way because of aving the job years ago.
While his actions give me the creeps, so be it. BUT both my 70 something MIL who freeks over nothing and my 70 something assistant ob class instructor shop there on a regular basis I worry about both of them.

luvmylabs23139
02-21-2013, 10:44 PM
Ken,

Thank you for your post. I have avoided this thread because it made me so angry that I was afraid of what I would post. I have decided to post my personal experience.

Several years ago before I moved back to my hometown I shopped at a local grocery store that employed a challenged employee. He always made me a little uneasy but mainly it was my fault because he wasn't like me. The first time he carried my groceries out I gave him a small tip. He was in disbelief that someone would do that for him. It made me feel bad that I felt uneasy in the first place for such a kind and genuine human being.

The next time I went to the store he switched with the high school bagger to bag my groceries. I thought well I guess he wants the tip. We got out to my truck and I pulled out my money and he refused to take it and gave me a hug. I cried on the way home for being such a sad cynical person to doubt his intentions.

I miss the hug I used to get when I shopped there........he had the milk of human kindness in his soul.

I don't mind if the thread makes some people mad. Magic and I go to situations every week with people that most people would not handle. Maybe I should have stated that. WE visit people with dementia every week. I am used to the slightly different issues and yet I get a bad feeling if ya know what I mean.

huntinman
02-21-2013, 10:50 PM
I don't mind if the thread makes some people mad. Magic and I go to situations every week with people that most people would not handle. Maybe I should have stated that. WE visit people with dementia every week. I am used to the slightly different issues and yet I get a bad feeling if ya know what I mean.

Yes, and you are the only one in your shoes...

charly_t
02-21-2013, 11:05 PM
I don't mind if the thread makes some people mad. Magic and I go to situations every week with people that most people would not handle. Maybe I should have stated that. WE visit people with dementia every week. I am used to the slightly different issues and yet I get a bad feeling if ya know what I mean.

I know what you mean. My retarded grandaughter feels this way about some of the others who are retarded etc. She avoids some of them whenever she can.

luvmylabs23139
02-21-2013, 11:41 PM
Yes, and you are the only one in your shoes...
OK I get your message. Stop working Magic and I won't be freeked by this guy?????
I only stated that he does what he does because gee he creeps me but Magic can get bopped on the head on a regular basis butt?????
I am used to situtions and deal with them on a daily basis but Im getting freeked out by this guy. This is not a patient. This is a person working in the gorcery store. If it were at any of the places I take Magic we would just stop going (although that does not solve the problem).
Maybe people should have said something about odd behavior and then maybe 20 kids would still be alive.

duk4me
02-24-2013, 08:12 AM
I have thought and thought and thought about this question "What can you Do about limited mental ability". I woke up in the middle of the night and it had come to me...............Put em on ignore!

mngundog
02-24-2013, 08:14 AM
I have thought and thought and thought about this question "What can you Do about limited mental ability". I woke up in the middle of the night and it had come to me...............Put em on ignore!
That right there is funny, I don't care who you are.:D

hotel4dogs
02-24-2013, 09:49 AM
There are tax incentives and credits for hiring mentally disadvantaged workers. That's why the companies do it, in my cynical opinion.

charly_t
02-24-2013, 01:08 PM
I have thought and thought and thought about this question "What can you Do about limited mental ability". I woke up in the middle of the night and it had come to me...............Put em on ignore!

Very funny, Tim :-) I'm glad that you solved that problem.

charly_t
02-24-2013, 01:18 PM
There are tax incentives and credits for hiring mentally disadvantaged workers. That's why the companies do it, in my cynical opinion.

I feel like you do about this. It bothers me that people and companies are willing to "use" those with problems.

On another note one of the clerks in Lowes home improvement store told me that Lowes sometimes gives discounts on large ticket items to the handicapped people. And I loved the washing machine we were were buying for the grandaughter........you can not turn the knob(s) the wrong way. Wonderfull for a retarded person.

duk4me
02-24-2013, 02:58 PM
I feel like you do about this. It bothers me that people and companies are willing to "use" those with problems.

On another note one of the clerks in Lowes home improvement store told me that Lowes sometimes gives discounts on large ticket items to the handicapped people. And I loved the washing machine we were were buying for the grandaughter........you can not turn the knob(s) the wrong way. Wonderfull for a retarded person.

by using them do you mean giving them an opportunity to feel productive is wrong?

charly_t
02-24-2013, 03:31 PM
by using them do you mean giving them an opportunity to feel productive is wrong?

No, I do not mean those companies etc. who hire them out of the goodness of their heart. I'm talking about the companies etc. who hire the handicapped to get the tax credits or whatever it is called. I'm guessing that that little perk is still available to whoever hires them. If you were deeply involved in the life of a handicapped person you would know of their hurt feelings etc. when their employer/boss expects more of them and demands it when they don't have the brains to get it right. I have always considered you to be a 'good guy' but my faith in you is wavering. :confused: