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Thread: Two cows ...

  1. #1
    Senior Member Gerry Clinchy's Avatar
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    Aug 2007
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    Pennsylvania
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    Default Two cows ...

    You've probably seen part of this before, but some additions have been made ...

    SOCIALISM
    You have 2 cows.
    You give one to your neighbour

    COMMUNISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and gives you some milk

    FASCISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and sells you some milk

    NAZISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and shoots you

    BUREAUCRATISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then
    throws the milk away

    TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
    You have two cows.
    You sell one and buy a bull.
    Your herd multiplies, and the economy
    grows.
    You sell them and retire on the income

    ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND (VENTURE) CAPITALISM
    You have two cows.
    You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by
    your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption
    for five cows.
    The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
    The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release.
    The public then buys your bull.

    SURREALISM
    You have two giraffes.
    The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
    G.Clinchy@gmail.com
    "Know in your heart that all things are possible. We couldn't conceive of a miracle if none ever happened." -Libby Fudim

    ​I don't use the PM feature, so just email me direct at the address shown above.

  2. #2
    Senior Member JDogger's Avatar
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    Feb 2003
    Location
    MRGV New Mexico
    Posts
    3,338

    Default

    Three cows is one of the notations in my hunting locations notebook for the MRGCD. I won't give the GPS. Those cows can toll ducks though.... JD
    One cannot reason someone out of something they were not reasoned into. - Jonathan Swift

  3. #3
    Senior Member
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    Default

    This is a 30 year old cut from an Ann Landers advice column to an English teacher minus the "Royal Bank of Scotland..". I suppose it proves that everything old should not be dismissed. I wonder where Ann Landers (now dead) stole it from?

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