on my email, and I have a couple of interesting tidbits to share. Hope they aren't too offensive.

Coming from a vocation that always questioned whether the glass was half full, or half empty...and concluding the glass was too large


The "sometimes" misperception that engineers have "sensitivity" issues:

A priest, a doctor, and an engineer one morning were behind a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!" The priest said, "Here comes the green-keeper. Let's have a word with him."

He said, "Hello George, what's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The green-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime."

The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything he can do for them."

The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"


And being a lover of catchy bumper stickers and unusual signs...especially when some are double-entendre types....

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: 'Dr. Jones, at your cervix.'
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In a Podiatrist's office: 'Time wounds all heels.'
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On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
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At a Proctologist's door: 'To expedite your visit please back in.'
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On a Plumber's truck: 'We repair what your husband fixed.'
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On another Plumber's truck: 'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber...
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On a Church's Billboard: '7 days without God makes one weak.'
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At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: 'Invite us to your next blowout.'
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At a Towing company: 'We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.'
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On an Electrician's truck: 'Let us remove your shorts.'
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In a Nonsmoking Area: 'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.'
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On a Maternity Room door: 'Push. Push. Push.'
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At an Optometrist's Office: 'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.'
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On a Taxidermist's window: 'We really know our stuff.'
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On a Fence: 'Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!'
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At a Car Dealership: 'The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.'
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Outside a Muffler Shop: 'No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.'
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In a Veterinarian's waiting room: 'Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!'
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At the Electric Company: 'We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be.'
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In a Restaurant window: 'Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up.'
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In the front yard of a Funeral Home: 'Drive carefully. We'll wait.'
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At a Propane Filling Station, 'Thank heaven for little grills.'
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And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop: 'Best place in town to take a leak'



I wonder if the sign in the Vets waiting room was discovered in Ed's clinic?

UB