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Thread: Just so you haven't forgotten...

  1. #1
    Senior Member Uncle Bill's Avatar
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    Default Just so you haven't forgotten...

    ...that we have a 'representative' form of government....it gives me so much pride in knowing what we have representing us in D.C.

    UB

    A Washington, DC, airport ticket agent shares some questions he was asked:

    1. A New Hampshire Congresswoman asked for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)

    2. A candidate's staffer, wanted to go to Capetown, S.A. While I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts". Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusettes, Capetown is in South Africa." Her response--click.

    3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that was not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!"

    4. A lawmaker's wife asked, ''Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."

    5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a one-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time."

    6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went very, very fast, and she bought that.

    7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, ''Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No, why do you ask?' She replied, ''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I know I'm overweight but I think that's very rude!'' After putting her on hold for a minute, while I looked into it (I was dying laughing), I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT--Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

    8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California, and then take the train to Hawaii ?"

    9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?'' I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes seem to have numbers on them."

    10. A lady Senator called and said, ''I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola , FL on a commuter plane. She said, ''Yeah, whatever!''

    11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.'' I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!"

    12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" The reply? ''Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.''
    When the one you love becomes a memory, that memory becomes a treasure.

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    God Bless you, Uncle Bill. You always have had a "way with words, especially about our Leadership"

    Ed Nelson

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    Senior Member dnf777's Avatar
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    If we had unlimited web space, we could begin to quote our former president's brilliant lines and add to the party!

    "Is our children learnin'?"
    God Bless PFC Jamie Harkness. The US Army's newest PFC, but still our neighbor's little girl!

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    Senior Member dback's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dnf777 View Post
    If we had unlimited web space, we could begin to quote our former president's brilliant lines and add to the party!

    "Is our children learnin'?"
    It's been an active couple weeks on here for you. Thought you were stickin' to the dogs???????????
    "What a difference a week makes. This week I feel like a football coach. Last week I felt like Britney Spears' choreographer."
    Coach Bob Green, Montana Tech

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    Senior Member dnf777's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dback View Post
    It's been an active couple weeks on here for you. Thought you were stickin' to the dogs???????????
    Do factual quotes bother you?
    And yes, I am stickin' to the dogs. Since I'm not in lock-step with Rush, I don't feel very welcome here. Seems only those who parrot Rush are acceptable. I'm going to work now, so I can help pay down the $5 trillion debt increase our latest brain-child gave us. (That's W, by the way) Funny, around here (Pennsyltucky) the people who gripe the most, pay the fewest taxes...in fact, most are getting MY tax dollars in unemployment!)

    later
    God Bless PFC Jamie Harkness. The US Army's newest PFC, but still our neighbor's little girl!

  6. #6
    Senior Member JDogger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dnf777 View Post
    Do factual quotes bother you?
    And yes, I am stickin' to the dogs. Since I'm not in lock-step with Rush, I don't feel very welcome here. Seems only those who parrot Rush are acceptable. I'm going to work now, so I can help pay down the $5 trillion debt increase our latest brain-child gave us. (That's W, by the way) Funny, around here (Pennsyltucky) the people who gripe the most, pay the fewest taxes...in fact, most are getting MY tax dollars in unemployment!)

    later
    Stick around. Thicken your skin. The righties here need jackin' up.

    JD
    One cannot reason someone out of something they were not reasoned into. - Jonathan Swift

  7. #7
    Senior Member dback's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dnf777 View Post
    Do factual quotes bother you?
    And yes, I am stickin' to the dogs. Since I'm not in lock-step with Rush, I don't feel very welcome here. Seems only those who parrot Rush are acceptable. I'm going to work now, so I can help pay down the $5 trillion debt increase our latest brain-child gave us. (That's W, by the way) Funny, around here (Pennsyltucky) the people who gripe the most, pay the fewest taxes...in fact, most are getting MY tax dollars in unemployment!)

    later
    What ever your short comings may be, entertainment value isn't one of them. I would equate your relationship with most members on this board in your first (under) 10 days here to my 4 year old grand daughter playing 'Wack-A-Mole' at Peter Piper, (your timing being substandard however)

    Do factual quotes bother me? I have no idea what that means but here's a simple 'quote' that you might recognize. "With all due respect to others, those I agree with and those I disagree with alike, I am going to respectfully leave this forum and stick to the Retriever Training room." Hours later you were again on POTUS....10 times to be exact versus once on RTF. Haeeeeell Yes! I find that very amusing.

    I find it equally amusing that you expect your elected officials to be beyond reproach in any facet of their lives, especially when history has shown that many of our most influential and important ancestors have had numerous 'human frailties'.

    This will be the first time I have ever agreed with dogger...hang around....in these trying times we need amusement.
    "What a difference a week makes. This week I feel like a football coach. Last week I felt like Britney Spears' choreographer."
    Coach Bob Green, Montana Tech

  8. #8
    Senior Member JDogger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dback View Post
    What ever your short comings may be, entertainment value isn't one of them. I would equate your relationship with most members on this board in your first (under) 10 days here to my 4 year old grand daughter playing 'Wack-A-Mole' at Peter Piper, (your timing being substandard however)

    Do factual quotes bother me? I have no idea what that means but here's a simple 'quote' that you might recognize. "With all due respect to others, those I agree with and those I disagree with alike, I am going to respectfully leave this forum and stick to the Retriever Training room." Hours later you were again on POTUS....10 times to be exact versus once on RTF. Haeeeeell Yes! I find that very amusing.

    I find it equally amusing that you expect your elected officials to be beyond reproach in any facet of their lives, especially when history has shown that many of our most influential and important ancestors have had numerous 'human frailties'.

    This will be the first time I have ever agreed with dogger...hang around....in these trying times we need amusement.
    Are you not amused dnf777? I'm amused...!

    Isn't that what all this is supossed to be about?

    Thanks, back...,dogger...,

    God...you guys take this so seriously...,

    jd
    One cannot reason someone out of something they were not reasoned into. - Jonathan Swift

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    <3 u JDogger!

  10. #10
    Senior Member JDogger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by eildydar View Post
    <3 u JDogger!
    Can you elucidate further? I don't speak your ????

    JD
    One cannot reason someone out of something they were not reasoned into. - Jonathan Swift

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